Tag Archives: relationships

Joyce Meyer

Joyce Meyer – Confrontation Can Be Loving

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Joyce meyer

If your brother wrongs you, go and show him his fault, between you and him privately. If he listens to you, you have won back your brother. —Matthew 18:15 (AMP)

When Dave and I got married, I was a nightmare to get along with. I just wanted to stay in control because I thought that was the only way I could keep from being hurt. Plus I have a pretty aggressive personality to begin with, so that combined with a lot of dysfunction in my background did not make me a very nice woman.

Dave, on the other hand, is a real peace-lover and very easy to get along with. For a lot of years, he went about being happy and didn’t really say too much to me while I acted badly. I believe God gave him extra patience with me because He knew the hurt I had in my life. Sometimes God calls us to put up with some things for a while, while we are praying and waiting on Him. To be honest, if Dave had confronted me in the first month we were married I would have just left him because I didn’t know any better. So there was a purpose in God not asking him to confront me right away. But you need to confront when God tells you to.

After a few years, God showed Dave it was time to confront me. Dave explained to me, “God has dealt with me that I can no longer let you get by with talking to me the way you do and acting the way you do. You’re not going to get everything your way, and things must change.” And they did. It took time, but little by little, I changed.

I was very angry when Dave confronted me. But by then I was loved by Jesus enough and I knew enough of His Word to know that Dave was right—I knew that my behavior was wrong—but if he would have never confronted me, even though I knew that it was wrong, I don’t know if I would have ever changed. So sometimes you are not doing somebody else a favor by not confronting them. It was the right thing for Dave to do for me. And even though I didn’t like it and I got mad, Dave was right to listen to God. And we are doing the work we do today because of it.

Trust in Him: Confrontation is usually not easy for the one doing the confronting, or the one being confronted, but it is an important part of spiritual growth. Follow God’s lead and confront when He shows you it is time, and do it in love!

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Charles Stanley – Building Solid Friendships

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Proverbs 17:17

Friendships are among our most valuable assets. Acquiring quality companions—those who will laugh with us in good times and stand by us during trials—requires shared commitment and an investment of time and energy. Healthy relationships thrive on . . .

Transparency. We must be honest with friends and encourage them to be truthful in return. To preserve a strong bond, we can’t hide hurts or feelings of rejection they may have caused. Transparency that is tied to accountability can also help make each individual a better person. A solid relationship allows each party to gently point out errors in the other’s life and offer loving correction.

Time and talk. Genuine friendship takes time to develop. We must be willing to put aside other obligations and give priority to moments spent together. A generous portion of our time with each other should be spent talking—speaking about our thoughts and desires and also asking questions to prompt our companion to open up. This type of conversation allows a glimpse into the other person’s heart and mind.

Thanks. Everyone likes to feel appreciated. Expressing gratitude when friends are helpful will remind them that we’re thankful to have them in our life. Moreover, we affirm our love when we communicate how much we enjoy a certain aspect of their personality or remember an occasion that is special to them.

Being a good friend is a way to serve the Lord. He designed us to be in relationship with others, so we should give our best to every companion the Lord places in our life.