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Some people excel in prayer.  They are the SEAL Team Six of intercession.  They’d rather pray than sleep.  Why is it I sleep when I pray?

It’s not that we don’t pray at all.  We all pray some.  Surveys indicate one in five unbelievers prays daily.  Just in case, perhaps?  When the disciples asked Jesus to teach them to pray, he gave them a prayer.  A quotable, repeatable, portable prayer.  Could you use the same?

Father, You are good.  I need help.  Heal me and forgive me. They need help.  Thank you.  In Jesus’ name, Amen.

Here’s my challenge for you!  Every day for four weeks, pray four minutes.  Then get ready to connect with God like never before!

Read more Before Amen: The Power of a Simple Prayer

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I’m a recovering prayer wimp.  For years my prayers seemed to zig, then zag, then zig again.  Maybe you can relate.  Perhaps your prayer life could use a tune up, a reboot?  If that sounds overwhelming, I’m inviting you to a simpler plan.  Four minutes, plus four weeks, equals forever change!  Every day for four weeks, pray for four minutes, focusing on these core elements of prayer:

“Father, You are good.

I need help.

They need help.

Thank you.”

It’s that simple.  Really!  Talking with God doesn’t have to be complicated or complex.  The power isn’t in the words we pray—but in the One who hears them.

Here’s my challenge for you!  Every day for four weeks, pray four minutes.  Then get ready to connect with God like never before!

Read more Before Amen: The Power of a Simple Prayer

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Jesus has seen every backstreet, back-seat, backhanded moment of our lives.  And he has resolved, “My grace is enough.  I can cleanse these people.  I will wash away their betrayals.”  For that reason we must make the Upper Room of Mercy our home address.

Jesus said, “If I then, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also ought to wash one another’s feet.  For I have given you an example that you should do as I have done to you” (John 13:14–15).

You are the creation of a good God, made in his image.  You are destined to reign in an eternal kingdom.  Secure in who you are, you can do what Jesus did.  Throw aside the robe of rights and expectation and make the most courageous of moves.  Wash feet.  This is how happiness happens

Read more How Happiness Happens – Finding Lasting Joy in a world of Comparison, Disappointment, and Unmet Expectations

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Resentment sucks satisfaction from the soul.  Bitterness consumes it.  Revenge has a monstrous appetite.  One act of retaliation is never enough.  Grudges send us on a downward spiral.

Some people perceive the path of forgiveness to be impossibly steep.  So let’s be realistic.  Forgiveness does not pardon the offense, excuse the misdeed, or ignore it.  Forgiveness is not even necessarily reconciliation.  The phrase “forgive and forget” sets an unreachable standard.  Painful memories are not like old clothing, easily shed.

Forgiveness is simply the act of changing your attitude toward the offender; it’s moving from a desire to harm toward an openness to be at peace.  A step in the direction of forgiveness is a decisive step toward happiness.

Read more How Happiness Happens – Finding Lasting Joy in a world of Comparison, Disappointment, and Unmet Expectations

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“His powerful Word is sharp as a surgeon’s scalpel, cutting through everything, whether doubt or defense, laying us open to listen and obey.  Nothing and no one is impervious to God’s Word.  We can’t get away from it—no matter what” (Hebrews 4:12–13 MSG).

Unsheathe God’s sword, the Word of God, and brandish its glimmering blade in the face of evil. When you read or quote a scripture in the face of pain or doubt or evil, you activate a weapon of the Spirit.  Say… I know a verse in the Bible that might help.  Or… A scripture that means much to me is… (your selection).

My go-to list includes scriptures like these:

“If God is for us, who can be against us?” (Romans 8:31)

“I will never leave you or forsake you.” (Hebrews 13:5)

This is how happiness happens.

Read more How Happiness Happens – Finding Lasting Joy in a world of Comparison, Disappointment, and Unmet Expectations

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Not only did Jesus not make it to the deathbed of Lazarus, he didn’t make it to the burial.  He was four days late.  Martha was forthright.  “Lord, if only you had been here my brother would not have died” (John 11:21).  Martha was to Jesus what your hurting friend is to you.  How can we respond when our friend is undone?

Here is what Jesus did.  He looked Martha in the face and said these starchy words: “I am the resurrection and the life. . . . Do you believe this?” (vv. 25–26).  The Bible’s word for such a response is admonishment.  Above all, admonishment is truth spoken into a difficult circumstance.  Yes, we hold the hand of the struggler.  And yes, yes, yes, we speak words of truth into moments of despair.

Read more How Happiness Happens – Finding Lasting Joy in a world of Comparison, Disappointment, and Unmet Expectations

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“Greet one another with a holy kiss.” Paul gave these instructions to the Romans and repeated them to other churches. Twice to the Corinthians (1 Cor. 16:20 and 2 Cor. 13:12); and then to the Thessalonians (1 Thess. 5:26).  Peter flew the friendliness flag as well in his first epistle (1 Peter 5:14) when he said, “Greet one another with a kiss of love.”

We tend to overlook these passages.  Why the big deal?  Why should we be careful to greet one another?  The answer is out of respect.  Respect is a mindfulness of another person’s situation.  Respect says “Hello” to the new kid in class. Respect says “Good afternoon” to the cashier at the checkout stand.  A greeting in its purest sense is a gesture of goodwill.  Simply greeting one another is not that hard.  But it makes a significant difference.  And this is how happiness happens.

Read more How Happiness Happens – Finding Lasting Joy in a world of Comparison, Disappointment, and Unmet Expectations

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We are not God’s gift to humanity.  God can use each of us, but he doesn’t need any of us.  We are valuable but not indispensable.  You love.  But who loved you first?  You serve.  But who served the most?  What are you doing for God that God could not do alone?

How wise of us to remember Paul’s antidote to joy-sucking self-promotion.  “With humility of mind let each of you regard one another as more important than himself” (Philippians 2:3).

Here is a helpful exercise that can turn your focus off yourself and on to others.  During the next twenty-four hours make it your aim to celebrate everything good that happens to someone else. Keep a list.  You will move from joy to joy as you regard other people’s success as more important than your own.  And this is how happiness happens.

Read more How Happiness Happens – Finding Lasting Joy in a world of Comparison, Disappointment, and Unmet Expectations

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“Lord, doesn’t it seem unfair to you that my sister just sits here while I do all the work?  Tell her to come and help me!” (Luke 10:40).

Of all the ironies.  Martha was in the presence of the Prince of Peace, yet she was the picture of stress.  Martha’s downfall was not her work or request; it was her motivation.  Rather than making a meal for Jesus, it seems she was trying to make a big deal about her service.

Might there be a bit of Martha within us?  What begins as a desire to serve Christ metastasizes into an act of impressing people.  And gifted Marthas become miserable mumblers.  Yet the Martha within is not easily silenced.  Mark it down.  When ministry becomes vain ambition, nothing good happens.  And Jesus does not get served.  No wonder the apostle Paul was so insistent when he said, “Do nothing out of selfish ambition” (Philippians 2:3).

Read more How Happiness Happens – Finding Lasting Joy in a world of Comparison, Disappointment, and Unmet Expectations

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Doing good does good for the doer.  Research bears this out.  When volunteers were put in a functional MRI scanner and were told they would be giving some of their money to charity, the areas of their brains associated with pleasure— like food and sex— lit up like Christmas trees. Giving to others triggers dopamine.  Perhaps that could be a new fund-raising slogan?

In another study a team of social psychologists distilled happiness factors into eight common denominators.  Two of the first three involve helping others.  Happy, contented people “devote a great amount of time to their family and friends, nurturing and enjoying those relationships.”  And “they are often the first to offer a helping hand to co-workers and passers-by.”  Seeking joy?  Do good for someone else.

Read more How Happiness Happens – Finding Lasting Joy in a world of Comparison, Disappointment, and Unmet Expectations

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As one Harvard professor said, “We think money will bring lots of happiness for a long time, yet actually it brings a little happiness for a short time.”   We’ve all seen happy peasants and miserable millionaires, right?

There is another option.  It requires no credit card, monthly mortgage, or stroke of fortune.  It demands no airline tickets or hotel reservations.  Age, ethnicity, and gender are not factors.  You don’t have to change jobs, change cities, change looks, or change neighborhoods.  But you might need to change doors.

The motto on the front door says “Happiness happens when you get.” The sign on the lesser-used back door counters “Happiness happens when you give.”  Doing good does good for the doer.

Read more How Happiness Happens – In this book Max shares the unexpected path to a lasting happiness, one that produces reliable joy in any season of life. Based on the teachings of Jesus and backed by modern research, How Happiness Happens presents a surprising but practical way of living that will change you from the inside out.

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No one knows me, we think.  People know my name, but not my heart.  They know my face but not my feelings.  I have a social security number, but not a soul mate.  No one really knows me.

The response of heaven is that God does!  Prophets weren’t enough.  Apostles wouldn’t do and angels won’t suffice.  God sent more than miracles and messages.  He sent himself; he sent his Son. In God’s great gospel, he not only sends, he becomes. He lives with us… as one of us.  He knows our hurt.  He knows our hunger.  He knows betrayal.  Most of all, he knows our sins.  He knows them better than you do.  He knows their price because he paid it.  “For Christ also suffered once for sins, the just for the unjust, that He might bring us to God” (1 Peter 3:18).  God knows you!

Read more Cure for the Common Life: Living in Your Sweet Spot

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We may relish moments of solitude—but a lifetime of it?  No way!  Many of us, however, are too fluent in the language of loneliness.  The kids used to need me…the business once needed me…my spouse never needs me.  Lonely people fight feelings of insignificance.

What do you do?  How do you cope with such cries of insignificance?   Some stay busy; others stay drunk.  Some buy pets; others buy lovers. Some seek therapy.  Yet only a few seek God.  He invites us to do so.  God’s ultimate cure for the common life takes you to a manger  “…and they shall call His name Immanuel,” which is translated God with us (Matthew 1:23.  There’s no withholding tax on God’s “with” promise.  He is with us.  God  is with us!

Read more Cure for the Common Life: Living in Your Sweet Spot

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God gives gifts, not miserly, but abundantly!  And he doesn’t give gifts randomly, but carefully, “to each according to each one’s unique ability” (Matthew 25:15).  Remember, no one else has your talents.  No one.  God elevates you from common-hood by matching your unique abilities to custom-made assignments.  “Well done good and faithful servant,” Jesus will say to some (Matthew 25:23).

Maybe your dad never praised you or your teachers always criticized you, but God will applaud you!  And to have him call you good… well, when he does, it counts.  Only he can make bad sinners good.  And only he can make the frail, faithful.  “Well done, good and faithful.”  The point? Use your uniqueness to take great risks for God!  The only mistake is not to risk making one!

Read more Cure for the Common Life: Living in Your Sweet Spot

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For the love of more, you might lose your purpose!  Just because someone gives you advice, a job, or a promotion, you don’t have to accept it.  Let your uniqueness define your path of life.  Isaiah prayed, “You, LORD, give perfect peace to those who keep their purpose firm and put their trust in you” (Isaiah 26:3).

Before you change your job title, examine your perspective toward life.  As the Japanese proverb says,  “Even if you sleep in a thousand-mat room, you can only sleep on one mat.” Success is not defined by position or pay scale but by this– doing the most what you do the best.  Parents, tell your children to do what they love to do so well that someone pays them to do it.  “Don’t be obsessed with getting more material things. Be relaxed with what you have” (Hebrews 13:5).

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Be careful!  In a desire to be great, one might cease being any good.  Not every teacher is equipped to be a principal.  Not every carpenter has the skill to head a crew. Not every musician should conduct an orchestra.  A promotion might promote a person right out of their sweet spot.  For the love of more, a person might lose their purpose.  Greed makes a poor job counselor.

Examine your gifts; know your strengths.  Romans 12:3 says to “Have a sane estimate of your capabilities.”  Proverbs 15:16 says, “It is better to have little with fear for the LORD than to have great treasure with turmoil.”  Don’t let the itch for things or the ear for applause derail you from your God-intended design!

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Listen to the way God described the builder Bezalel, “I have filled him with the Spirit of God, giving him great wisdom, intelligence and skill in all kinds of crafts. . .” (Exodus 31:3-5). Can you hear the pleasure in God’s voice?

When you do the most what you do the best, you pop the pride buttons on the vest of God.  In the movie Chariots of Fire Eric Liddell defended his devotion to running by telling his sister, “God made me fast, and when I run I feel his pleasure.”  When do you feel God’s pleasure?  When do you look up into the heavens and say, “I was made to do this?”  When it comes to being you, you were made for the part.  So speak your lines with confidence!

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The apostle Paul said, “Don’t compare yourself with others.  Each of you must take responsibility for doing the creative best you can with your own life”  (Galatians 6:4-5).

Before Thomas Merton followed Christ, he followed money, fame and society.  He shocked many of his colleagues when he exchanged it all for the life of a Trappist monk.  Many years later a friend visited the monastery and could see no important difference in him.  “Tom, he said, “you haven’t changed at all.”  “Why should I?  “Here,” he said, “our duty is to be more like ourselves, not less.”

God never called you to be anyone other than you.  But he does call you to be the best you that you can be.  The big question is, at your best, who are you?

Read more Cure for the Common Life: Living in Your Sweet Spot

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God made you and broke the mold!  Every single baby is a brand-new idea from the mind of God.  Scan history for your replica; you won’t find it.  God tailor-made you.  You aren’t one of many bricks in the mason’s pile or one of a dozen bolts in the mechanic’s drawer.  You are it!  And if you aren’t you, we don’t get you.  The world misses out.

You offer a gift to society that no one else brings.  When you and I do the most what we do the best for the glory of God, the Bible says that we are “marvelously functioning parts in Christ’s body” (Romans 12:5). You play no small part, because there is no small part to be played.  God “shaped each person in turn” (Psalm 33:15).  We need you to be you.  And YOU, need to be you!

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